Shut Up SHUTIN UP Bunky!

We shall move onto smaller snippets for your view amusement.  This shall remain for venting and/or just to share idiotic things that Bunky does and I need to get off my chest.

So how many of you kids remember Spike and Chester?  Chester was the little pest that wouldn't shut up.  Hyper active and trying so hard that Spike could barely stand it.  Care to take a guess who's who here?

My brother, (Bradford if you're reading this) can attest to this.  I can't stand crunching mouth noises whilst watching a film or TV.  I so rarely take the time to actually sit and enjoy.  To have peace 'n quiet isn't asking for too much or is IT???

It's late last weekend.  Bunky is out so I take full advantage, enjoying peaceful solitude with Christmas lights and a few candles to light the room.  I'm snuggled up on the couch with some tea an enjoying Pan's Labyrinth.  I have to concentrate as I don't understand Spanish and taking in both the film and sub-titles.  DAMN I can hear jingling of keys, fumbling with the door and a thud as Bunky comes crashing in.  Lumber lumber lumber into the kitchen Bunky goes.  A quick hello as Bunky passes, "oh Pan's Labyrinth... great film"  I'm praying to God Bunky has late evening plans so that I can continue to watch in peace. Now there is rustling of bags, crashing of cupboard doors and the microwave now in use (it ain't quiet).  There is also an occasional question asked of me.  I'm politely answering but in side my head I'm screaming Shut UP, dear Jesus please make Bunky shut the hell UP!  Bunky now moves to the living room where I am.  I am now being serenaded with potato chip bag rustling and crunch crunch CRUNCH.....  rustle rustle rustle.  I finally have to look up from the couch and give my annoyed face with a reply of....  really must you do that right here.  Oh sorry!  I think I offended Bunky but off Bunky scampered into the bedroom with the evening nuked food.  Fortunately Bunky was just fueling for an evening out.  I did get to finish watching the film in solitude.

Sunday's are sacred to me.  It can mean an early morning run or sleeping in. When it's cold it's more about coffee and OPB.  Bunky has the day off, but generally sleeps til noon or so, in which case I can watch my early morning shows, get showered and set off for the day.  Not the case yesterday.  Eh, still having the Christmas spirit within me I made extra coffee and both Bunky and I had a pleasant exchange of morning banter and what the plans were for the next few days.  It was nice until.... I'm enjoying Nova it was the show on Cathedrals - way cool documentary.  Now do you think Bunky could just sit, drink coffee, eat his breakfast and let me enjoy - NOPE! yamer yamer yamer (think of John Candy - Trains, Planes and Automobiles) this and that.  I finally had to say...  Bunky, please shut the hell up I'm trying to enjoy the program.  Bunky just laughed and called me mean.  Ohhhh Bunky is that all you have? 

So you see, I have the human form of Chester living with me.   God love Bunky, somebody has to!

The many challenges of Bunky

All right I have been tempting you with the many reasons that have prompted me to start this little blog.  So here goes

In one of my first blogs I had mentioned that Bunky was merely renting a room.  I was very clear with the space and truly the lack there of.  It wasn't even a conversation of "reading between the lines"  I was straight up clear!  Eventually most things found a home and the apartment was put back in order.  I did bend a wee bit.  Bunky has this God-Awful over stuffed (90's) old school chair.  Yup it has a home in the living room.  I cringe just a little every time I see it.

Lets move forward a few weeks into co-habituating.  I've mentioned that Bunky is in a perpetual state of arrested development right?  I'm dealing with a 43yr old that maturation was reached at about age 14 for the little tyke.  Now don't get me wrong I enjoy a good time just like the rest of ya's but grown-up fun.  Going out with the main goal of getting "F'd up" (Bunky's words not mine) really isn't my cup 'o tea.  Sure it happens I'm not an angel but that's not my main goal.  It took a few weeks of saying....  No, Bunky NO I don't wanna take shots with you and smoke a bowl.  Bunky had a boo-boo face for awhile.  Mama has a grown-up job with grown-up responsibilities.  Bunky finally gets it.

This now leads me into the meat of this post.  Bunky is often a childish annoyance!  Background: Bunky likes to stay up late and if Bunky knows I won't be home she likes to entertain and when I say entertain it's occasionally a 20-something booty call.  Ouch who would hit that you ask?  Well it's an eclectic little group.  Some are comic book friends, some are friends of friends and, well, God only knows!  Ok I'm getting off subject again.  As I started to say...  I go to bed fairly early during the week.  I live in N Portland.  While N Portland has come a long way, it's still a bit sketchy at night.  I live in a duplex so anyone can walk right up to my front door and bedroom window.  One weekday evening I'm sound asleep.  In the fogginess of my peaceful slumber I think I hear the door bell.  Naw, I'm dreaming go to sleep.  Nope, nope there it is again.  Son-of-a BITCH it IS the doorbell.  By this time I look over and it's about 11:30pm.  I'm thinking to myself "Friggin' Bunky can answer the damn door it's likely his booty-call"  note to self - scold Bunky in the morning about weeknight visitors.  So I try to drift off again knowing full good and well it's not for me and who in their right mind would open up the door so late.  Next thing I hear is knocking at my window.  Now my heart is racing - who or what the hell could it be.  I ignore once again only to hear the pounding getting a bit louder and a "Hey Carin...  It's Bunky let me in"  At this point I am Elaine Benes mad!  I get out of bed and open the door.  I say not a word 'cause if I do I'm gonna explode.  I get an apology and I shuffle off to bed.

I'm gonna add a snippet more on Bunky - this will all come together better.  Bunky LOVES to text.  Random weirdness is what primarily goes out.  I finally had to say to Bunky...  ease up tiger and please stop texting after 9pm - you're bugging the crap outta me and I don't find it cute.  With that said I do keep my phone close to me.  My folks are aging and you just never know when you'll receive an emergency call so I never turn my phone down.

Back on track, let's continue.  I'm blessed that my boyfriend Coleman lives about 4-blocks away and I stay at his house roughly 3-4 nights a week.  His house is quiet and just the two of us. It's about one week later from the "lock-out" incident.  I'm at Coleman's and we're fast asleep.  The phone rings and I quickly snap to it all the while thinking it's my family and trying not to wake him up as well.   Guess who it is?  YUP Bunky.  It's 2am and the WANKER has lock himself out again.  I am so PISSED!  Basically the conversation was - so you expect me to get dressed and let you in?  How irresponsible!  Sleep outside or find a friend.  I hang up.  I'm wide awake (so is Coleman by now) and I feel that damn Irish-Catholic guilt.  I text her right back and say...  I'll be home in a few.  I get there and Bunky is somewhat jovial and says...  Oh dude I am so sorry.  I say: Shut the F*CK up, I'm so pissed right now and if you say another word I'm gonna punch you in the throat!  Bunky tucked her tail and whimpered into her bedroom.  Next day as we calmly discussed what had happened and I apologized for being so angry Bunky suggests a key under the door mat.  Are you FECKING kidding me?  No NOT an option.  Put on your big-girl panties and have your key with you at all times.  Hell hang the bitch around your neck for all I care, just don't lock yourself out anymore and expect me to let you in every time.  I can happily report this hasn't happened again.  At least I haven't been affected anymore.

So between the move-in, getting settled the odd smells coming from his bedroom, walking into the house with a smokey blue thick stench of incense, cooking/fried smells of late night cooking (Bunky loves to eat, eats a lot and not much on the healthy sense) It's been a long 3-months.  WOW it's only been 3-months, seems like ages!

Ok, the piece de resistance of this little story.  I'm a bit of a neurotic germ-a-phob.  I've come a long way.  Shoot a few years ago Bunky would not have step foot in me house.  It's a Sunday morning, I'm just out of the shower and getting ready to start my day.  Bunky asks if she can use the bathroom.  I say sure as long as it's a pee (jokingly) the response was uhhh noooo.  Ok, Bunky no probs just spray and lite a match will ya.  Bunky finishes up, opens the door and proceeds to talk to me.  I'm thinking like the majority of us Bunky is washing hands with soap and water.  I look in adn to my horror the hands are merly being run under water and then proceeds to wipe poopie hands on MY hand towel.  I feel the nausea rising up.  I have a quick flash of all the times I've used that towel and how many times I've brushed my teeth or splashed water on my face and used that towel to wipe my face.  Oh man...  BUNKY please tell me you used soap and warm water to wash your hands?  Nope, I never use soap, why?  Jeeeeezzzzz seriously I have to explain why you use soap/water after you go to the bathroom.  I grabbed the towel, barked again and have never put a hand towel up again.  Needless to say my progress with germs has had a little set-back.

Oh it's so hard not to throw Bunky out on her ear.  Between the hand-holding and other annoyances, it has many challenging moments.  But I keep in mind that I'm saving a few pennies and getting my visa paid down slowly.  A bit more to share, but will save for another time.

Happy New Year, enjoy the peace and quiet of your homes and remember...  Cleanliness is next to Godliness - wash your hands with soap kids!

Movin On UP!

When we last left Bunky, he was just getting settled in.  We had decided on a move in date, it was on a weekend.  I was being polite and decided to leave for a few hours so Bunky could move in without someone hovering.  How much stuff could Bunky have?  I was merely offering a room for rent, right?  Sure we're sharing space but my home is fully furnished... Bunky knows this.  As some of you know I'm kind of orderly and like a slightly minimalist lifestyle.  My home is simple and not a lot of clutter.  So I'm home  now and the living room was filled with boxes including Bunky's room.  GOOD GOD was my first thought.  Where is ALL this shite gonna go?  Bad Bunky BAD!  Bunky does love her comics books, DVD's and books (poetry, philosophy and novels) See Bunky does have some cool geeky qualities.  We all love geeks, am I right?  Hell I'm a 'tard.  I'm going off course here.  Basically I had a small anxiety attack and proud of myself, very politely said to Bunky: Bunky (slight elevated tone) not all of this stuff is staying, right?  What you can't fit in your room you're putting in storage, correct?  Cutting to the chase yes, YES Bunky fit most of it in his room.  The room is somewhat organized with different size and shaped bookshelves.  I feel claustrophobic when I pass by and the door is ajar. You look at my room and it's the polar opposite.  Simple bed, night-stand and dresser.  My room is modest, clean, airy and open.  Bunky's room is cluttered, dark and filled with Bunky's personal effects (TV, bookshelves an even an office desk - amazing!)  Sweet Bunky is so happy and feeling free from mama's home.  Yes, Bunky is moving on up and happy as a pig in shite! 

I think we are best described at the Odd Couple.  Oscar Madison and Felix Ungar 1970's version.  But who is Felix and who is Oscar?  My fridge has mostly been stocked with a few condiments, beer, some eggs and cheese not much more than that.  Bunky LOVES a full refrigerator.  Bunky tends to look a bit disheveled most of the time and lumbers.  Bunky has categorized all of the comic books and such.  I'm a sporto and yet hates to be dirty and sweaty. So you see, it's not quite clearly defined as to which character we actually are.

Whewwww I think that's enough for tonight.  I promise you we'll get down to the root cause of why I've started this little blog.  I feel I needed to establish the personalities a bit and the move in  

This little place is not the best place I've ever lived.  Parts of it is cool like my built-in bookshelves in the living room and the hardwood floors. One bookshelf dedicated to books/pictures the other has been set up as a cool schwervy wet-bar.  All in all it's kind of a little shit-hole.  Enter the sweetness and humility that Bunky possesses.  Bunky has said many, many times.  GAWD I love this place, it's one of the best places I've ever lived.  For all the dumb-shit things Bunky has done, all the personal space that has been infringed upon it's all worth it an I am humbled at that point.  There has been a few times where I wanted to punch Bunky right in the throat but Bunky does have a few redeeming qualities.  

So stay tuned, the next installment will be something to do with either food or keys.  God only knows, there have been a few crazy things that have happened within the last 2 short months.

Bunky's Introduction

I'm sure there are many posts about roommate's.  I can well imagine some are rants, some are hilarious and maybe one or two might be written as a story.  Well this is Bunky's story,  that's Bunky the Roommate to you.

Bunky came to me October 1, 2012.  Bunky had been living with her/his mom for quite a long time.  Her/His you ask?  Well Bunky is gender neutral.  Sometimes Bunky might be referred to as "she" or "he" depends on what I'm feeling at the time. Right, now back to the story.  I was feeling financially stressed.  Sure I could pay the bills and rent but not much else to show for.  Bunky was feeling like she needed to spread her wings and see what life would be like beyond mamma's house and so we agreed and my second room turned from potential massage space to Bunky's Room!  Bunky was now renting a room.... A ROOM

I will catch you up in small increments these past two months.  They have been filled with disruptions, sweet times, irritated times, funny and plan old fashioned WTF??!!!

First installment... My bookshelf and personal pictures.  It's my little corner of this cozy flat.  I came home one of those first few days and what did my eyes see but Bunky's pictures mixed in with mine.  I found it odd.  I felt so primal at that point and wanted to pee on everything and mark my territory.  I know, I know not nice I have to learn to share but really, couldn't Bunky find a different place for one's own pictures we aren't dating fer feck sake!

There's plenty more where that came from.  Some are down right funny some are just weird an will make you wanna scratch yer head and say what the FECK but all in all Bunky's heart is in the right place or at least I think so.